Hey there, this is a rarity, isn’t it? Two weeks of reviews in a row? I know, for those who are following this, I did mention maybe getting two reviews done last week, but as you can tell, it didn’t pan out. I’m only 16 episodes in and as I’ve stated several times, it has been quite the struggle. For every good thing that has happened, be it a match, an angle, what have you, I’ve had to sit through a lot of bland, forgettable nonsense. Perhaps I should just power through this and try to get like, years done on a weekend so I can actually get to a point where ECW starts to resemble well…ECW, you know, the stuff that we remember and is more talked about.
With that said, we do pick up with one episode this week, last week, I was a bit underwhelmed, as usual. We saw a pointless tag title switch, another show ending brawl, and really that was all there was. We haven’t followed up at all on the JT Smith/Dark Patriot angle, which saw Patriot throw Smith off the top of the Eagle’s Nest in the ECW arena, which was a big deal and has been glanced over basically. The Sandman/Rockin Rebel angle has picked up with the recent blinding of Peaches, but that has also felt underdeveloped after being a focal point during the earlier episodes. As well as some other stuff that seemed to start, but never really gets followed up on.
ECW Hardcore TV #16
Episode 16
July 27th, 1993
We kick this show off with a recap of last week’s show ending brawl. Tod Gordon gets laid out by Sal Bellomo and it’s just a huge chaotic situation. Although, I do wonder why in a match between Jimmy Snuka and Terry Funk, the Suicide Blondes and the Super Destroyers find their way into the brawl. As the two teams have no real ties to either men or the Dangerous Alliance, so it just seems a bit forced.
Moving on, we have a press conference setting up Ultraclash 1, a big ECW arena show. It’s here that Gordon announces that both Stan Hansen and Abdullah the Butcher will be at the show, as well as a huge scaffold match between JT Smith and Dark Patriot. He then goes on to talk about the issue of fines and suspensions due to a lot of the recent chaos and actions by certain wrestlers. First up, Rockin’ Rebel, they recap the incident with Peaches, he is suspended for 90 days. Next, Freddie Gilbert, the phoney referee that was involved in the Texas Chain Match between Eddie Gilbert and Terry Funk, wherein under a false name, Gilbert posed as a ref and cheated Funk out of a win. Still, a shame we haven’t seen that match in full.
Gordon states that at the Ultraclash show, he’ll have a huge surprise for Eddie Gilbert and Paul E. Dangerously. Then, he talks about the recent wild brawls, and how Sal Bellomo attacked him. However, because of fan letters that state it was an accident, no real actions will be taken against Bellomo, aside from fines, which are also dished out to everyone involved in last week’s brawl. Gordon then name drops the WWF, the NWA, and WCW before stating that this isn’t any of those promotions and that they will not allow the Freebirds rule for the Suicide Blondes, which leads him to strip them of the tag belts. I’ll get to that a bit later, as it’s not a decision I’m excited about. But we will have a tag tournament to crown new champs.
Tod Gordon then goes on about Eddie Gilbert, talking about the segments as of late where he walks about Philly as the self-proclaimed “King of Philadelphia” as well as other incidents involving him. Gilbert has been trying to get into this meeting to speak to Gordon, but Gordon dismisses the woman sent in on his behalf, eventually Gilbert barges in and gets in the face of Gordon over his Ultraclash opponent, but the cameras get cut before things get out of hand.
After all this, we cut to Eddie Gilbert in the control centre, he has taken over the show and is the host for today. He trashes the usual crew of Jay Sulli, Tod Gordon, and some others and talks himself up. After the “commercial break” Eddie continues to hype himself up and mentions that we’ll be seeing a special video of his adventures in Philadelphia, however, that’s not the case, as whoever edited this show or perhaps Tod Gordon, won’t have any of it. We cut the ring instead for our first match.
Canadian Wolfman vs Terry Funk
Don Muraco, the ECW champion is on commentary with Jay Sulli. It took nearly 20 minutes of recaps and talking to get to any in-ring action. I wouldn’t say that it was a terrible decision, but for a show that’s only 45 minutes, I don’t think you should waste a lot of time on all that talking. But, that’s just me. Funk no sells Wolfman’s offence and drops him with an awkward, unsafe looking body slam. But he makes up for it with two decent look ones, followed by a leg drop. Terry wraps this one up pretty quickly with the spinning toe hold.
Winner: Terry Funk by submission
Thoughts: Much like some of the other squash matches on these programs, it was perfect for what it was. A short, to the point match, that got over Funk and didn’t waste too much time. Aside from almost killing the poor guy, there isn’t much to say about this.
Post-match, Snuka and Dark Patriot come out, at first glance, Funk runs away. But, that’s not the case, as he goes to get back up, in the form of the returning Road Warrior Hawk, who last we saw, was blinded by Hotstuff International. The two run down Eddie Gilbert and his goons, it’s a pretty short, but solid promo.
Back in the control centre, Eddie Gilbert lectures the director of the show, about the format of the show, as the previous match was not supposed to be aired. Instead, it was supposed to be the “Adventures of Eddie Gilbert” which we end up getting now. Some goofy looking guy is stopped by Gilbert and Dangerously, the two have him sit down with them at a restaurant, and Gilbert makes some jokes at his expense. They shoe him away and then another guy comes over. It’s an awkward exchange and just falls flat for me.
Johnny Hotbody vs The Sandman w/Peaches
Peaches is with Sandman, showing no signs of the incident with the Rockin’ Rebel, so I assume this was something taped prior to that show. I am proven correct, as Hotbody is referred to as one-half of the tag champions. I wish these things weren’t shown out of order, I assume they tape these matches in blocks, to break up into the weekly show, meaning you’d see some guys 3-4 times a night, which would explain the short matches all the time. That or, they just tape a whole show and pick and choose what matches to show. Either is fine, but at least show things in order, it’s weird to see one show where we’re hyping up a massive angle with the Sandman and these title changes, then next week, we’re seeing matches taped like a month ago.
Anyways onto the match itself, standard stuff, nothing special. The two trade your usual array of basic moves, Hunter Q. Robbins gets involved and whacks Sandman with the cane, but a pin attempt by Hotbody is countered into a roll up and the Sandman picks up the win.
Winner: Sandman by pinfall
Thoughts: Pass, it’s a standard match, but it’s nothing special. Although, it is one of the times a match between two established guys going under 5 minutes doesn’t bother me.
Post-match, Rebel comes out with Tigra and they rip off Peaches clothes, to which the Sandman doesn’t try to stop, but he does end up brawling with Rebel. It’s an okay segment, but this could’ve been aired weeks ago, prior to the whole Rebel blinding Peaches thing. It makes me feel like I’m watching things out of order when we jumble up the angles and air them whenever we feel like.
Back in the control centre, Eddie Gilbert rambles on and then mentions an incident with some guy named Rob Jaworski, who I assume is a football player from back in the day or something. They hyped this up earlier at the press conference and I guess it made news outlets after it happened, garnering some publicity for ECW. Gilbert states that they don’t have footage of this incident and instead says they’ll show him vs Bruno Sammartino. I may think we’ve seen too much talking for my liking in this episode, but Gilbert is a good heel and I have enjoyed some of the stuff dealing with him over the past few weeks. However, Gilbert doesn’t get his wish, as we cut to a match between Eddie Gilbert and Glen Osbourne at an outdoor event.
Hunter Q. Robins is out with Eddie Gilbert and claims that Gilbert was injured by Hawk the night before and he cannot compete today. I guess this was a special charity show, but they only have like 30 people watching this thing. The fans boo, Gilbert hypes himself up, standard stuff. Osbourne looks upset, but his day is about to get worse. Gilbert clocks him from behind with a cane and forces the ref to count the three. I won’t judge this as a match, as it’s more a segment than anything else. Osbourne pops right back up after the three and just leaves, arguing with the ref. Kinda kills it, instead of seeking revenge or selling the sneak attack, he just leaves.
Eddie calls out Rob Jaworski, who has no hesitation and heads towards the ring, cheered on by the fans and some of the faces who are at ringside. Jaws as the fans are calling him takes the mic and cuts a terrible promo, it’s a good thing sports players don’t have to cut promos like in wrestling I guess. Some jaw jacking and eventually Jaws decks Gilbert and he powders to the floor and the faces celebrate with Jaws in the ring. It’s alright, nothing special, but I can’t complain.
Eddie Gilbert is ranting in the control centre about the event we just saw, Jay Sulli shows up and confronts about Gilbert about him taking over the show. They have some banter before Sulli says that he’ll be here next week as the rightful host of the show and we cut to the credits.
Overall Thoughts
It was alright, I felt like there was a bit too much talking, rather would have seen more wrestling. Considering that it is a wrestling show, especially one with only an hour a week. But at the same time, I will admit, the hijacking by Gilbert and all his heel antics were enjoyable. Though the segment with the fans at pizza place wasn’t good at all. The matches we saw were alright, but it does bother me how they can’t show some of these matches/angles in order. They could’ve aired the Sandman match earlier and then this week we could’ve seen the big angle where Rebel blinds Peaches. It just hurts the continuity of the show. Plus, the tag belt situation, I’m not a fan of. I understand Gordon wants to lay down the law and I don’t mind him stripping them of the belts and denying the Suicide Blondes any special privileges, but that’s another title change basically within three weeks and now we’ll have to wait awhile to get new champs, from an already weak division.
In closing, it had its moments, but ultimately, it wasn’t something I was a huge fan of. I did enjoy some of the Gilbert antics and for a one-time thing, I didn’t mind him taking over the show. Beats seeing lame matches I guess, so yeah, that’s all I have to say. I’ll see you all next week and as always, thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed.